No one had a worse night at the MTV Video Music Awards than Britney Spears.

But the two gentlemen pictured below came close:

Tommy Lee got into a fight with Kid Rock, all because they’ve both seen Pamela Anderson nude. As if this isn’t true for half the free world.

Meanwhile, Criss Angel had spent the last two weeks claiming he was hanging out with Britney Spears in order to help the hot mess with an illusion for her performance. But all the audience saw were a few minutes of awful lip synching and lackadaisical dancing.

This makes it fairly obvious, to paraphrase a Jerry Maguire quote, that Angel has been “shoplifting the pootie of a single mother.”

And that’s just wrong.

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